Devotion has a very personal meaning for each of us. Especially in leadership. It bundles life lessons, past experiences, better or worse, and creates a meaning that we also apply to the relationship with the team we work with or the organization we go to work for. We associate devotion with the delight that comes from beautiful memories that still fill us with the emotion of the moment when our trust, responsibility, and commitment were appreciated, or with the gratitude we had for people we felt were devoted to us and our mission.

In the same way, when we talk about the need for devotion, we are tempted by the disappointment of experiences where we expected devotion and loyalty and did not receive it, or even were personally betrayed or our expectations were not met. And in this case, we become more skeptical about the possibility that real devotion exists, especially in the organizational environment.

All in all, we are selective and tempted to double standards when it comes to devotion. Compared to the dry notion of commitment, which circulates in organizational environments and which seems to refer rather to a rational commitment, based on the understanding of the purpose, on the understanding of the importance of the requirements, on the conscious submission of effort to contribute to the general purpose, on the decision to staying in the company, when we talk about devotion it is more about the soul in combination with the mind of each of us.

An aspirational value

Coincidentally, I've had four or five discussions in the last few weeks where the debate about loyalty, devotion, and the extent of it or whether it exists, not just an aspirational value, has come up. My recent experience shows me that people are easily distrustful of this kind of values.

Trust, loyalty, and devotion do not exist punctually, or abstractly, they materialize in relationships, and they are about two or more people who contribute to the consolidation of this capital. We are not loyal to an abstract organism, generically called an organization. Why would we be?! But we can feel devotion to people we respect, we become loyal to an idea or a philosophy that we believe represents us in the long run and that came from somewhere from some people who were inspired to verbalize it attractively and convincingly, have were inclined to transfer them to us, to inspire and attract us, to educate us.

We can be loyal to our convictions and visions, which are never outside of relationships with the people around us, because they will come to life in a context where there are other people, in a system that works according to our vision and in a climate that makes us feel stimulated to support these ideas and visions and value them. An exchange that becomes virtuous for all parties involved.

Leadership and the relationship with the people we lead are based on emotion, on such values, and on the principles that derive from them and encourage behaviors that we interpret as corresponding to our notion of devotion and loyalty. While we agree in principle that trust, loyalty, and devotion are needed, we always keep a safety margin. Each of us nuances and sets limits to ensure his safety zone, so as not to be hurt or disappointed. And this is where the debate begins...

Devotion is based on a balanced exchange

Earning commitment and loyalty is part of the definition of success for many managers when it comes to their teams. He waits devotedly. I don't think there should be no devotion, and if you ask what would be the limit, the frontier of reasonableness that he expects, that is quite generous. No one is naive to expect devotion under any circumstances, but somehow devotion falls into the "obviously I expect this" category. What makes it obvious? Because getting commitment requires commitment from the leader, equally…

What can put devotion in the "obviously must exist" category is behaviors that concern respect and the application of common sense in the relationship with them, but, above all, the absence of behaviors that erode devotion and loyalty. I'm thinking here of how people can sometimes feel humiliated at work, and we have no idea because we don't think about the fact that a remark said in public or a certain tone could be the very element that reduces the frontier of devotion. And I think about people who can feel judged if they come out with vulnerability admitting that they need help or that they can't handle certain aspects. I can think of various jokes that take on the character of sarcasm and are not only accepted but sometimes encouraged by managers who misunderstand the familiarity.

What creates lack of devotion

We seek people's devotion and loyalty without always asking ourselves what creates the lack of it to the extent we expect. Because devotion, like trust, is about emotion. And here our beach of learning about people is infinite.

Skills such as "observing", "being connected and present", "sensing what is happening around and giving the meaning", and "paying attention first to people before any activity, strategy or task"... These are the kind of skills that generate devotion and loyalty. Skills we need to train non-stop. A fluid dynamic between people, regardless of their formal responsibilities. Devotion is earned person by person, it is by no means an abstract notion.

There are also voices—yes, I've heard them—that claim no devotion is needed. That people come into a workplace where they must be used as best they can, based on their competence, and rewarded accordingly. That they are free of any emotional loyalty to the team or their leader, and they can always choose to leave when they feel the need to.

I provoked this kind of approach by asking "What makes you say that?" … And, I heard them speak rather of the need for safety and not to be disappointed in the man who, perhaps, has gone through negative experiences in connection with the need for devotion. And this kind of disappointment extends to leadership. So what do we do when such people lead other people and allow themselves to be led by their own beliefs that become limiting and kill the possibility of creating a genuine relationship with those they work with?

Term in the success equation

It is the time of the year when we look at "engagement" results. At least in the organizations I have access to, it seems that people's "devotion" has increased. Somehow against the global current where people talk about "silent quitting", here, people appreciate what the companies have done for them in the last two to three years and declare their commitment. It's not a generalization, but I think it's a good time to reflect on what companies have done positively during this period. It is a moment of reflection about what was missing, to take even more into account the man from whom we expect devotion. And to conclude, commitment is a consequence of leadership that puts purpose and contribution at the center and not just completing tasks and achieving goals. These depend on commitment: the attention people consciously pay to what is important, the way they poke around to find solutions or generate new ideas, and the willingness to be open to another's perspectives and to collaborate. Dedication is part of the success equation.

The article appeared in the publication Cariere.ro